My babies, my sweet little girls, my everythings
no longer tiny or completely dependent,
you do not fit in the cradle of my arm
and it’s been an eternity since I could carry you around.
But I can still wrap my arms around you
and as I’m comforting you, it comforts me,
every time you call me mom or mommy my heart leaps.
Continue reading My Babies
This one still makes me a lil sad….
If you don’t want to handle my tears,
you don’t get to see my smiles
If you don’t want to hear about my fears,
I won’t tell you about my joys
If you aren’t willing to walk the long miles,
then you don’t get to be part of the journey.
If you don’t want me to share my soul with you,
then I’m not going to share my body with you either.
If you don’t want to build a home together,
its futile for us to play house.
If you don’t want to acknowledge me in the open,
then you don’t need to behind closed doors.
If you don’t want to hold my hand in the sunshine,
don’t expect to be holding anything else in the darkness.
I am taking all my power back,
I know what I want, I know who I am and I’m not settling.
If you don’t want all of me, you can’t have any of me!
Looking for old poetry of mine and found these random ramblings about love and why I jump and others are slow and all that that means….
There is a difference between encouraging and supporting someone in growth,
and trying to get them to change to be the person YOU think they should be.
What is the point of being with someone, if their love feels so conditional?
If they’re only with you because you’ve been molded into the person they want you to be?
Its not about becoming someone the person you want will want,
its about finding that person who wants you just the way you are, at this very moment,
and who brings out the best in you, whose presence makes you want to do better,
who wants to move forward in the same direction as you.
I used to wonder if I should change this or change that as had been said by a past lover,
but if I can’t be all the contradictory things that make me me, if I have to alter who I am,
if I have to pretend to not want the things I want, if I can’t be comfortable around him –
then he’s not falling in love with ME – and what’s the point in that?
Continue reading Random ramblings about love…and such
So, as coworkers and I are packaging pasta today at a volunteer event, one of my coworkers is asking people “what’s your story?” We meet a guy who grew up in Minnesota, went to college in Minnesota, met a girl in college, married her and now they’re raising two sons out in the suburbs. He’s got a nice office job, his wife’s a teacher, there is talk of parents and in-laws who are still married, teaching kids to ride bikes, date nights.
And then…the question eventually turns to me. Jennifer…What’s your story? And I cringe. Continue reading My Story