Why the F*&CK am I Dating?

Stare at profile after profile

Word after word

Stabs at humor, failed attempts to seem woke,

Acronyms I have to google

Pictures with dogs, fish, babies

Pictures perfectly posed in front of cliché travel icons

Lists of the prerequisite things everyone must like;

Travel, wine, food, laughter

Swiping left at any hint of non-monogamy seeking

Poly this or open that

They whiz by my face in a blurry haze

I type out greetings, quick responses to their uninteresting hellos,

Tell just enough about me, but not too much

Nothing to scare them away, nothing to be too vulnerable

What do you do for a living?

What do you do in your spare time?

Do you have kids? Do you like kids? Do you want more kids?

Double-check their profiles

In an attempt to keep them straight;

Was he the one with two brothers or the only child?

Did he work in compliance or IT?

Looks aren’t everything, looks aren’t everything, looks aren’t everything,

OH MY GOD, are these the male versions of me?

I’m not looking for a 10, but I think I’m more than a 3?

Why oh why oh why are hipster beards a thing?

I’m supposed to someday want to kiss that person????

I know, super judgey, but I’m looking for MY partner, right?


I have not seen a single picture of a single person who I can picture holding hands with

Who I can see myself laughing with, dancing with, staying up all night talking to

I’m doing this song and dance

I’m looking

I’m being open, right?

This is what I’m supposed to do

I’m supposed to date, I’m supposed to search,

I’m supposed to move on and get over you – right?


But its mind-numbing

Its time wasting

None of them will ever morph into you…






3 thoughts on “Why the F*&CK am I Dating?”

  1. …this is because intimacy and connection are organic. Plain and simple. Lists aren’t. I know that people have to utilize these sites but…I don’t know. It’s disheartening and seems to have left so many either being unaccountable, or cold from bad experience. It’s changed the entire culture of courtship.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Exactly – I think I fall in love in a much more organic way and feel connections with people that are not necessarily based on anything tangible. But with online dating, it is matching you based solely on attributes which are SUPPOSED to make you a match, but so far have not. No amount of shared interests are going to create butterflies in my stomach or conjure up unexplainable chemistry!
      I have also heard people say they’ve fallen in love online, without actually meeting a person. I think I’m way too physical of a person, no matter how much I like what they have to say – I can not FEEL anything until I can look into their eyes and feel the touch of their skin against mine.


      1. The biggest thing it can’t do is afford the time and investment needed to ever get to that next stage to begin with. That has to be built and…it’s all just superficial and rushed based on what people have chosen to tell/show the world. Not on personal or private sharing. I know some people have met that way but so many relationships have probably been headed off because it is so, so impersonal at the core. Caring for someone isn’t a knee jerk decision!

        Liked by 1 person

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