I have technically been single since October 2, 2010. I say technically, because it took us awhile to act broken up – bout February/March 2011 we finally stopped acting like a couple. Several people have blamed my being stuck in singlehood since then on my being “too picky.” The first time I heard this, I was shocked. Now that I have heard it several times, I feel the need to explore this theory and why I disagree with it. Straight away I just want to say that I believe a certain level of “pickiness” or standards is appropriate, that one should know what they want, what they like, what they don’t like, what they will not tolerate and should value themselves enough that they don’t just settle for the first person to give them a little attention!
So, lets look at the gents I summarily dismissed, shall we?
#1 A guy who used to date my sister, who I refer to as “Uncle” when talking about him to my kids, and who has spent about half of the time that I have known him in prison. Sure, he has a great body, a charming smile, he works out, he’s always been nice to me and the kids – but what am I going to do with an ex-convict who has 3 kids and is still married to some crazy lady who lives in another state? (oops…did I forget to mention that last part?)
#2 A guy who falls in love with strippers and wasn’t even old enough to drink at the time.
#3 A guy who lives with his girlfriend and obviously didn’t want anything more than to hook up.
#4 A guy who was the sloppiest kisser I have ever met, felt like he was trying to eat my face and was microscopic down below. Also, I couldn’t understand a word he said over the phone!
#5 A guy who my sister tried to hook me up with who had MAJOR intimacy issues, was a CLEAN FREAK and a HUGE germaphobe. What about me, with two kids and a house that is ALWAYS a little messy and who likes to share meals with friends when I go out (yes, you can have a bite off my plate if I can have a bite off yours, and oh – sure, drink outta my drink, I don’t care) screams – she should date a clean freak germaphone?!?!? Granted, he was smart which I find super sexy, but I never would have felt comfortable inviting him inside my house and I am too lovey-dovey of a person to be with someone who DOES NOT KISS (and if he’s not kissing upstairs, he’s probably not kissing downstairs either)
#6 I attempted to date a white guy for the first time in a long time, and a red head at that which I usually do not find attractive AT ALL. He drank like a fish on our first date and then acted like I was the love of his life and he missed me terribly afterwards. Drunk stalker anyone?!
#7 Cute, a few years younger, a big boy just like I like em. But seriously, we ran outta things to talk about after like 2 conversations. And he is the PICKIEST eater I have ever met in my entire life. I am sorry, I NEED depth and to have stimulating conversation and someone who cares about what is going on in the world.
So, that is all I can think of as far as guys who have perhaps liked me but that I’ve been “picky” and dismissed in the past 2 ½ years. What do you think – have I been too picky? This also doesn’t include the few guys I have REALLY liked and would have been with 100% in a heartbeat, but they didn’t reciprocate. So there HAVE been ones who have met my “picky” standards, I just perhaps haven’t met theirs and/or they weren’t looking for a relationship.